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Our Scars as Poetry

7/12/2011

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The tattoo on my left forearm reads, "All the poems written in your skin." When people ask me what it means I tell them it's an inspiring song lyric by Goldfrapp, which it is, but I don't tend to go into great detail with strangers on the true meaning. Today, I'd like to share what it means to me with you. This is a delicate subject, but bear with me.

In my late teens and early twenties I went through a long bout of depression. I'm not sure where I got the idea or why I thought it was a good idea, but cutting became a way to control overwhelming emotions. When I became so enraged or upset that it felt like my body might explode, I cut my left arm to "release" the pain. Of course, it never really fixed anything and I always ended up feeling upset again, but for a long time I did that, even after I was past the depression. It became a quick way to deal with sadness. The easy way out, so to speak.

So of course I have little scars; most of them have faded to a subtle white, but there's one, my last one I think, and the most visible that runs vertically through the first line of my tattoo: All the poems.

I could regret harming my body and causing scars to form, but I've come to cherish what they represent. When I heard those lines in Goldfrapp's song "Some People" I immediately knew it had to be my first tattoo. Why? Because my scars are my poetry. They represent who I was, who I've become, the challenges I've faced and overcome, and the poetry I've written to express what it feels like to hurt deep inside the core. My scars are literally the poems in my skin.

When I look at my tattoo I'm reminded of this and also that there are so many more poems and stories written inside of me and waiting to be put on paper. Best of all, there are as many happy poems as there were sad.

Please keep in mind that I in no way condone cutting oneself for the sake of art or beauty. It was only something that I experienced and have learned to honor instead of regret.

Love your scars, if you have them. Whether they were intentional or not, physical or emotional, they are part of you. They are the poems written in your skin.
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    ​Hello! I'm Cassandra, an American ex-pat living in the Philippines, writer, ballerina, and lover of all things magickal. I blog about happiness, self-love, and magical dream-life living.
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