​I'm not really sure what I want to write about, but I have the urge to do so.

I guess I want to say that I don't quite know where this blog is headed, and I'm okay with that.

Not that I don't want it to continue, but that it doesn't really have a path. There's no "end game" to it. There's no intention, like making money, behind it.

In the beginning there was. Way back in 2011/12 I wanted it to be a starting place for my freedom. I wanted The Sacred Middle (which was initially called Gypsy Love Warrior) to be how I made money. And it did here and there, but that's not what's important to me now.

I made a name for myself in the wedding industry and I'm happy with that. That's where I make money. That's where I put my business focus.

For a long time I frustrated myself because I was trying to run two businesses, two very different businesses. There was the wedding writing business and there was The Sacred Middle, and I could never really find footing for TSM. It felt abstract.

I thought it might be like Gala Darling when she first started and she just wrote amazing blog posts and inspired people and she became her own brand. Then she wrote a small book and this and that, and I thought, maybe I can do that. But the internet had already evolved and I couldn't catch up.

I didn't want to make videos or play on social media all day or make tons of courses. I certainly didn't want to think like a business person. I wanted it to be easy and evolve effortlessly (like I thought it had for so many others). 

Everyone knows that blogging to make a buck is hard, or at the very least, time consuming. And although a part of me really wanted to sit in front of a computer and write all day, another part wanted to go to the beach and explore and attend parties and you know...just live life.

I'm afraid if I don't offer a bunch of stuff to you all, that I'll lose you. People want stuff, but I don't have it in me (at this moment) to create courses and e-books and whatever else becomes popular. 

I really do just want to write. I want The Sacred Middle to be a place of inspiration. Like the old days, remember? Live Journal? Zines?

I hope you do find inspiration here. With or without "stuff."
​

• Time management
• Creativity
• The writer's life
• Focus and productivity

I really, really, really, really want to write a novel, but I'm stuck in that classic loop of having an inkling of an idea, get really excited and start writing about the idea, get half way through writing the novel (or probably less that 1/2), have no idea where the story is going, get another shiny, new idea that seems better, abandon the old novel idea, start the new one, and around and around we go.

I've gone through at least three cycles of that. 

These books are helping with all the stuff I've been thinking about and dealing with:

• The Plot Whisperer: Secrets of Story Structure Any Writer Can Master by Martha Alderson
• Growing Gills: How to Find Creative Focus When You're Drowning in Your Daily Life by Jessica Abel
• Daily Rituals: How Artists Work by Mason Currey

In a way, I feel bad for thinking about such trivial things during such a messed up time in our world. 

But all of these tragic events remind me that most things we find important in life are trivial. Material things, for instance. It can all be wiped out, just like that. Your house could get flooded or go up in flames and then what? What do you have when you strip away all the material stuff?

Support, shelter, food, water - that's all that really matters. In a post apocalyptic world, none of us would think about what clothes to wear or if our food came from Whole Foods. I mean seriously. Why do we waste heart beats on this stuff?

Eat some meat and vegetables, own a few outfits you really love, do whatever lights you up, help those around you, spend time with people you adore.

But now I'm rambling...

Anywho, that's some stuff that's been swirling around in my mind. 

​What's going on in yours?

This is a guest post by Lystia Putranto. 

While it’s no question that relationships, whether it’s the one we have with our significant other or our family or friends, are to be cherished, the most important and by far the longest relationship we will ever have in our life is actually one we have with ourselves. After all, by learning to give love, acceptance, and compassion to ourselves, the more we'll feel whole and worthy and the more we have and are willing to offer to the world.

That said, I know firsthand that it can be extremely difficult to believe that we are worthy. Ever since we were kids, we have been told otherwise by our loved ones, bosses, colleagues, clients – and even strangers. Nevertheless, this is precisely why it’s crucial for us to become our very own best friend. With so much vying ‘against’ us, we’ve got enough on our plate that we need all the support and love we can get.

Here, I’ll be sharing with you some simple yet effective ways that have personally helped me to cultivate and strengthen self-love. May these tips help you to become kinder and gentler to yourself too!
 
1. Make Time for Self-Care

Has fear of missing out or being disliked prevented you from being able to
set some time for yourself? Well, it’s time to start learning to say ‘no’ to things that you think do not add any value to your life. By passing on events or added responsibilities
that are not so important, it becomes much easier for you to make the time to do things that you actually enjoy.

Whether you choose to spend it by getting more sleep, going to an invigorating  yoga class, or picking up a new hobby, it’s all up to you! Practice self-care regularly by committing the time and effort you need to become the best version of yourself – because you’re truly worth it.
 
2. Connect with Your Inner Self

We may not want to admit it but most of us live our lives basing our values on our successes and failures. Deep down, however, we know that these ‘things’ do not illustrate the whole picture of who we really are. So, let’s ingrain it into our heads that our self-worth does not equate to our net worth – and act accordingly.

One way we can effectively do this is to learn to connect with our inner self (the soul) through activities that quiet the mind and bring it to a state of peace and stillness such as meditation or journaling. As Ma Jaya Sati Bhagavati, a renowned spiritual leader, beautifully said “Quiet the mind and the soul will speak”. 
 
3. Apply Emotional Freedom Technique (EFT)

Several years ago, a life coach, who happens to be an EFT practitioner, introduced me to Emotional Freedom Technique as a way to calm myself whenever I’m feeling stressed, anxious, or critical of myself. Though its name may appear rather scientific, it’s actually a pretty simple healing tool where we tap ourselves on specific parts of the body (acupressure) while repeating an affirmation. 

The great thing about this technique is that it can be done just about anywhere as it only requires a bit of time, our fingers, and a ‘mantra’ or affirmation. I’ve personally found it to be quick and effective in helping me to release negative energy when I’m feeling extreme emotions and to regain a sense of calm and balance.

4. Stop Playing the Comparison Game

We’re all familiar with the comparison game; it’s that dreadful yet addictive game where we compare ourselves with practically everyone we know and even those we don’t! The truth is, each and every single one of us is special and we all have our own unique purpose and path in life. Comparison is the ‘thief’ of joy and it prevents us from counting our blessings and embracing our already beautiful lives. Instead of comparing our journey to the journey of others, we should focus on being grateful for who we are and what we already have. 

Energy flows where attention goes. The more you recognize who you are and what you already have, the more abundance and blessings you will manifest in your life.
 
5. Give Up the Need for Approval from Others

“Old habits die hard,” they say, and from my own experience, I admit that it’s not that easy to let go our need of approval  –  but it’s certainly not impossible.

We can start to do this by choosing to consistently speak our truth. When you believe in an idea or have an opinion that differs from those around you – stand by it. Be aware when you are tempted to conform to someone’s else’s opinion just for the sake of having them on your side or obtaining their approval, and consciously choose to resist it.

In order for us to live our very best lives, we must learn to be independent of the good opinion of others. This means that we need to learn to make choices and take actions that are unapologetically true to who we are. After all, the only validation we truly need is one that we give to ourselves, so stop living your life trying to impress others. Live
your life trying to impress yourself instead!
 
About Lystia Putranto:

Lystia is a personal and professional development blogger who seeks to inspire and
to motivate people to create and to live out their best lives. A proponent of
meditation, she actively encourages those who seek to become their best selves to integrate meditation as part of their daily routine.