Hello Celestial Soul! I apologize for skipping the April tarotscopes - I was having some major internet issues and skipped blogging altogether. 

But I welcome May with open arms and guidance from my new Paulina tarot deck. The cards are beeeeeeautiful! I love 'em to bits, and I hope you'll find exactly what you need within your card this month.

The Hermit walks beside a lake under a starry sky. She's guided by the stars and her lamplight and has her companions to keep her company should she need it. But what she really longs for is a meditative journey and deep soul searching. She longs for understanding and solitude. Like the Hermit, you may be craving solo time. Seek time for self-reflection. Retreat to a sacred place in nature if you can. A place that brings you peace. Ground yourself there. Close your eyes and listen to nature's language. What can it teach you about yourself?

Taurus' are known for rolling up their sleeves and grabbing the bull by the horns (i.e. getting the work done). But the Two of Pentacles suggests a little more work/play balance. It might feel shaky at first, like you're riding a unicorn and you only have one leg to balance on, but trust and allow yourself to play, to take a chance, to move swiftly through change. Stay flexible and don't take yourself too seriously. You can still be productive, but have fun while you do it.

Dearest Gemini, what has you all tangled up? Fear? Jealousy? Overwhelm? I know it's hard to gather strength when you feel bound, but now's not the time to play victim. No one can save you but yourself, especially if all those brambles are ones you've grown. Take the sword of liberation and cut them loose! I want you to do two things: first, buy a sage stick and smudge your home. Second, imagine all the negative feelings as brambles wrapped around your body. Now take your hand and cut through them - like a karate chop. See all that crap falling away from you. Once it's all cut loose, take a step forward and walk into your new self-confidence.

Too many cooks in the kitchen, too many balls in the air, too many horses on the track! You have a lot on your paper plate right now and it's getting a bit soggy, but you're not going to let that get you off track. The key word for the month is determination and you have a lot of it. Action and energy will push you forward while a calming force will keep you sane. Your effort and invigoration throughout the month will lead you to a well-deserved victory.

I'll be honest - as a Leo, I'm not digging this card. Two people huddled in the snow, a look of misery on their faces? Fellow Leos, whatever storm is on its way, whatever hardship we have to face, know this...we aren't alone. Someone will be there to help us through. And through all the snow and rain and whatever decides to beat down on us, we must must remember to look up, because there above us will be a glow of hope. The sun will shine again and it will be brighter than ever. 

Listen to your intuition because it's on fire this month. You'll know what to do and when to do it if you just look within and listen to your own guidance. You may even find that others are eager to hear your advice and wisdom. Feel free to help out a little, but don't give all your secrets away.

Oh, the overwhelm! Dearest Libra, I fear you're taking on more than you can handle. Yes, yes, they may be things you truly care about and want to do, but something's gotta give. Whatever your responsibilities are, if you're feeling the pressure, let up a little. It's time to check things off your list, de-clutter, and clear those obligations. Afterward, take a long, hot bath and vow to keep your calendar clear for awhile.

Ambition rules the day! Look at the Emperor's face; it's a picture of determination and dedication. He advises you to stand in your strength and become the leader you know you can be. Endurance is on your side this month, so dive into those biz/life goals and get things done. Success is surely on its way. 

Is it hot in here or is it just you? You're feeling mucho sensual this month, in all areas of your life. In fact, life is seducing you and you're ready to play. Allow your sensuality and sexuality to guide your choices. Learn the art of seduction from goddesses like Kitty Cavalier and Veronica Varlow. Nurture yourself, learn what pleases you. When you stimulate your sensual side, life will flourish.

For you, dearest Capricorn, May is all about good chemistry. By that I mean balance between opposites. All the hot and cold in your life is flowing just as smoothly as rain down the river. Whether it's relationships, situations, or your own thoughts, what once seemed to clash is now a beautiful blend of fire and ice. Tip: Innovation comes through combination.

We're talkin' bout love, sweet love. This month, remove some of those bricks from your wall, open your heart a little, and let some love in. It doesn't matter whether it's from a significant other or yourself - give some love, get some love! And what does it take to love? Honesty, trust, communication, and partnership. If these things have been lacking in your relationships (including the one with yourself!), now's the time to nurture them and make them stronger. 

Hey Sassy McSassy Pants! I see you struttin' your stuff. You're full of confidence this month and not afraid to kick it queen style. The Queen of Wands offers you energy, creative passion, and a little feline fierceness. Fill your inspiration well with her gifts and your enthusiasm, courage, and independence will bring you much admiration and success.

I get it. 

You want to include rituals in your life, like the ones your favorite authors/bloggers/gurus have. You read about them waking up before sunrise to meditate at their altar of crystals and candles or how they set up the most beautiful full moon ritual complete with singing bowls and dancing naked. 

It all sounds so dreamy and you really, really want to infuse your own life with those practices, but...but...life happens. 

I've had "do a moon ritual" on my list for ages. Inevitably, something comes up or, you know, I just get lazy and don't do it.

Does this happen to you too?

Magic and rituals don't have to be grand events. There are simple, under-five-minutes kind of rituals we can put into practice and satisfy our need for daily mysticism.

So here you go - five itty bitty rituals you can start and end your day with.

We hear that a lot, "Love the skin you're in." It means getting comfortable with our bodies, how we look, who we are on the outside. But what about our actual skin? 

Let's talk about skin color.

Did you know there are more Google searches for how to get white skin than how to get tan skin? As a Westerner this surprised me. I mean, I've been told all my life that tan is the way to go. Tan is beautiful. Here's some bronze powder and self-tanning spray. 

But if there's one thing I've learned since living in Asia it's that skin color and what's considered beautiful is relative. 

You won't find a lick of bronzing products here. You won't find self-tanners or tanning booths. You will find loads of whitening creams and soaps. You'll see ads that tell you that the whiter you are the more beautiful you are. 

In America, people always made fun of my fair skin. I even get the occasional why are you so white question from other Westerners living here in the Philippines. 

But the Filipinos, they love my skin! I think they love it more than I do. I can't tell you how many times Filipinas have commented on how beautiful my skin is and how they would trade their brown skin for my white skin in a minute. 

They cover up to go to the beach. They carry umbrellas so as not to get darker. They slather on whitening creams in the hopes of instant white skin.

Us white girls, on the other hand, spend hundreds of dollars on bronzers and tanners. We sunbathe at the beach. We'll do just about anything in the hopes of achieving a sun-kissed glow. Screw premature aging and cancer.

Do you battle with this as much as I do?

I tell my husband, "I'm going to stop worrying about getting tan and just be proud of my fair skin." A few days later he'll find me sitting in the sun sans sunblock.

"What happened to loving your fair skin?"

...

Now I have a sunburn down the front of my chest and across my back. I don't even want to admit how many horrible sunburns I've had in my life, even though I know they won't fade to brown. I have numerous sun spots speckling my back and I can see a few of them starting to surface on my face. And let's not even talk about the mysterious spot next to my spine that gets red, crusts over, then disappears for awhile. It always comes back. 

What have I done to myself in the name of beauty? What lengths will I go to to achieve some standard that changes from one part of the world to the next?

Here's the thing...

I WILL NEVER HAVE DARK SKIN!

I've lived in the tropics for two years, and although I'm darker than I was when I left America, I'm still white. Some people don't even know I'm tan.

I'm tired of beating up my body in order to please random people, especially when the majority of people around here think I'm beautiful just the way I am. 

I'm also tired of some so-called self-love advocates making beauty a thing. Here is the self-tanner I use when I go on vacation to the Bahamas. Love yourself!

I was perusing through some of The Wedded Bliss' makeup articles, trying to find something to post to Facebook (I handle their social media accounts), and came across this one on tanning. I love Von Criswell's advice to her clients:

I also love what Brandi Burkett, a photographer from East Texas, said in the article.

A skin tone muse - brilliant! 

I'm adopting Tilda Swinton as my muse, and every time I think about heading for a sun spot with the intent of "just getting a little bit of color," she'll appear and whisper into my ear something about wrinkles and cancer and how being alabaster and odd looking is quite amazing. She'll also appear any time someone mentions how white I am and how I should really get some sun. She'll wink at me with those color-changing eyes and I'll kindly respond by telling said person that I'm quite proud of my fair skin. I might also ask why said person thinks it's so important that I get more tan. Is it because they think I look ugly? Because, you know, it might be fun to make someone feel awkward.

If we're going to practice self-love and truly love the skin we're in, let's not forget our actual skin. Doesn't matter if it's white, brown, black, yellow, blue, purple, or red. It's yours and it's all you've got. There's no sense in trying to make it what it's not. I know if we start loving our skin now, we'll thank ourselves later. 

If you need to, pick a skin-tone muse to help you on this journey. Learn about her and summon her when the societal skin gods start beating you over the head with tanners and whitening creams. And forget what other people think. The most important people in your life love you for who you are and see waaaaay past your skin color.

Photo Credits: Born of the Flowing Water by Ronnie Biccard | Tilda Swinton for Nars